you'll find this hysterical. Leslie and I have two dogs and two cats. The parallels of this read and our reality are just too close. I was laughing so hard I was crying.
*The Dog's Diary*
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
*The Cat's Diary*
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are Fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an Attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their Feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made Condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was Placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and Snitches.The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and Seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now......
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Easy Hunting
This summer my wife's uncle came up with an idea to build a hunting blind that his son (and anyone who wants to stay out of the weather) could hunt from. He asked me if I knew anyone who'd be interested in helping with the project and I came up with one name- Meathead. So I asked Meathead and he agreed and we started planning. I was the middle man going between Rick and Meathead (Eric) planning the project. The I got a supply list, took it to Lowe's in Eric's truck, filled one of those big lumber cart things until it was so heavy I had to push on it for about two seconds before it started to move, and then headed it out to the truck to find Eric's truck wouldn't start. About an hour later and figuring out the problem I drive across town and Eric and I build the base for this blind. Weeks later we take the base and the rest of the lumber out to Rick's farm and start putting this thing together. We prebuilt all the walls up at the shed and quit for the day. The next week we came back and put the walls on a trailer and took them down to the spot for the blind and started getting everything in place. We worked until dark that day and got the roof on while using the lights on the tractor to see what we were doing. Then we came back again and set the windows (which are Andersons) and put on the shingles. It was quite an ontaking but it turned out great. the actual "box" is 5'X6' inside with 7' high walls. The platform is 8'X6'. There is a trap door in the bottom of the box with a ladder going to it. There is also a ladder going to the 2'X8' landing on the backside of the platform. From the landing you can take the third ladder to the roof and hunt from there as well. Each window has been offset from the one across from it to prevent wildlife from looking straight through the box. The screen over the windows is screen that you can shoot through either with a bow or gun. Not all the screen was up when the pictures were taken. The inside of the box is painted black so it's nice and dark. It's almost impossible to see into the box with the combination of the screen and black interior. It was a big project that turned huge. The finished product is really cool though- so it was worth it. I don't know that I'll ever hunt out of this blind, but you could spend the coldest day hunting in it very comfortably. I need to take some pictures of the view from this blind. It looks out over a field that stretches for about 300+ yards. The blind is backed up to a small wooded area and hills are on both the left and right sides. Maybe I'll get some pictures of that this weekend when gun season opens.
Sunday, November 04, 2007
The morning after State Cross-Country
I really wasn't planning on hunting this morning. When I went to bed I was pooped. The state Cross-Country championship wore me out- and I didn't even race. Those kids have a lot of energy. It's funny how they can just ride up and down an elevator like it was Space Mountain. Anyhoo, I figured if I woke up and felt good- I'd go. I haven't had very good luck the past couple of years. Some of it has been my fault, some of it has been just bad luck. Like yesterday when my historically top two runners had major issues and the worst races of their season. You have to keep trying if you want something though. So I went and it paid off. Right now deer is becoming jerkey. Funny how your day can change quickly. One moment you're chasing a doe trying to get some action- next thing you know you're soaking in soy sauce.
Honda should sponsor me.
Honda should sponsor me.
Friday, November 02, 2007
State Bound
In about 3.5 hours I'll be leaving for Cross-Country state Championship in Jefferson City. It's pretty cool to think we made it this far our first year out with a sport we haven't had here in about 25 years. Even if we hadn't made it to the championships, I'd still be very satisfied with this year. Everyone worked hard and improved over the season. Next year will be even better.
Although we didn't have a full girls or boys team, we still qualified 4 of 7 individuals for the championship. That's a nice percentage.
Although we didn't have a full girls or boys team, we still qualified 4 of 7 individuals for the championship. That's a nice percentage.
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