Friday, January 23, 2009

Profanity in Fiber



Catchy title. This is my third year being the breakfast supervisor at my school. Basically, my morning consists of making sure I'm in the breakfast/lunchroom every morning by 7:35 when the students are allowed in. Then I get to watch them eat and hopefully clean up any mess they make. You'd be surprised how often they want to leave without cleaning up their area. It's really frustrating. It's like, "Why would you want to leave a mess? That's like taking a crap in the bathtub." So I'm like the breakfast cop. It's not all bad though. Lots of kids come tell me things they otherwise wouldn't since it's an odd time of the day. School hasn't started but they are there and a little more relaxed. Or maybe it's me who's a little more relaxed at that point- not sure. I also get free breakfast everyday and I get paid a whopping $50.00 a month for the job which is about $5.00 an hour.
So we have a big menu at breakfast:
Monday: Pizza
Tuesday: Sausage on a stick wrapped in a pancake (a breakfast corndog! Are you fucking kidding me? No. They even have syrup to dip it in.)
Wednesday: French Toast sticks (holy shit- this is a deep fried heart attack)


Thursday: Biscuits and gravy (THE BEST DAY OF THE WEEK FOR BREAKFAST)


Friday: Sausage egg and cheese biscuits (second best day of the week for breakfast)


Now, you must understand this isn't the full menu. There is also a wide variety of juice and cereal. The continental school breakfast if you will. Thrown in with the mix we also have cinnamon toast, yougurt, bagels, oatmeal, and some other better choices.


It's not all as bad as it seems, but I often opt for the cereal with skim milk and a couple of juice cups. So this brings me to my main idea. This morning I got the Raisin Bran. I like this cereal. It's the most healthy of the ones they offer and a guy needs his fiber. So I open the cereal which conveniently comes in it's own bowl. All you have to do is pour on the milk. Well, on this particular day, they should have just called it "Bran". There wasn't one goddamn raisin in the whole goddamn bowl! It was weird and I took it as a bad omen for the day. A day I was giving a test. Fortunately, the test actually went better than expected. So let's see what you know about 6th grade math. I'll send a prize to the first person who can define "GCF" and "LCM" correctly with an example in the comments section. Good luck. This is not a joke- I'll really send you something. You have to say what the letters stand for and give an example of each.

5 comments:

Brady said...

Greatest Common Factor = The largest common integer divisor of two numbers. the GCF of 128 and 196 is 64.

Least Common Multiple = The lowest integer, mulitple shared by two numbers. If each number is prime, the LCM is the numbers multipled. LCM of 3 and 9 = 9 LCM of 3 and 7 = 21.

That's right, I still remember 6th grade math. It's the 16th grade math that I have a hard time remembering.

Beefcakes said...

We have a winner! Where do I send your prize?

Prozenberger said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Brady Beckham said...

twenty six twenty four Trenton
Joplin, MO six four 801

I can't wait!

kal said...

jees. Brady beat me to it.