Just remembered

So when we were down in Mexico, I played some beach volleyball. This is post edge of death sickness- so I wasn't hittin' on all eight to say the least. I pretty much felt like half or a little less. Nonetheless, I tried. Well, there was this couple there from Texas, more than likely Dallas- westend folk. The guy seemed nice enough- kind of quiet and reserved but having a good time. His wife on the other hand was...hmmm....something else shall we say. She thought and dressed like she was every straight man's fantasy. It was just a little over "over the top". She was yelling at the other guys on her team when they'd miss a bump or spike or whatever and acting like she was ready to knock the ball down my throat. But what really stuck with me and still makes me kind of chuckle to think about today is what she kept yelling at her husband. You need to hear this in your head with a heavy Texan accent and think of an older, not really in shape, scantly clad, leather skinned, half buzzed, half naturally obnoxious "lady". She must have yelled to her quiet, reserved husband at least a dozen times, "SPIKE IT TONY!!!!" Yeah well, Tony was about 5'6" and there weren't gonna be no spikin' on this net ya'll. It was about two feet above regulation and he didn't even have the wind in his favor. But... she kept yellin', "SPIKE IT TONY!!!" I'll leave you with another gem she said when he missed a shot. "Well, guess what you're not getting tonight?"

Here's a photo just because:

This is a resort delivery truck. One more drink and I would have taken off on it and let them chase me.

Rainy Day Post

It was getting kind of brown and dry around here, so I washed my car yesterday. You're welcome Columbia. No joke- the last time it rained here was the last time I washed my car by hand- pretty ironic.
It's been a month since my last post and it's probably be longer before I posted again but after looking at K.A.'s blog a moment ago I thought I better play a little catch-up. So let's see what's happened in the past month: Went to Mexico- good time except for getting very ill and not leaving our room for about 36 hours. I never really quite recovered the rest of the time we were there. I'd feel better- then worse, better- then worse. I think Leslie and I agree that Jamaica was better. Jamaica is just socially warmer.
I've been running a lot. I did part of the MU cross-country camp this week. I only did one of the runs, but it was a really good one out at Rockbridge State Park. We ran about seven miles and I was able to keep up with the halflings (kids half my age). Other than that it was going to talks on running mechanics and whatnot.
This Sunday I'm going on a camping/float trip with longtime friends, Morgan and Mac. We haven't done anything like this together in about 10 years or more. We're heading down to the Jack's Fork river which is spring fed and in big time Deliverance country. I'm sure we'll quote the movie more than once. You know, "Who's playin' that banjo?" "You got a real pretty mouth on ya. Yer gonna do some prayin' for me." "Take them panties off. Take 'em straight off!" Oh what fun we'll have. Kermit will be glad to know the squirrels will be safe. (inside joke)
I almost went out and bought a bike a couple of days ago. I just felt like riding. So I went out for a long run and got over it. Actually, I would like to get a bike just so I could ride if I wanted to. The problem is that I'd have to get a nice one after always having had nice bikes. That's a big investment I'm not sure I want to make today. We'll see what happens.
Let me see if there are any pictures I want to share... no. See you next time.

A new kitchen and new friends

The past 10 days have been way busy. I finally finished the school year and on the last day,which was filled with meetings in the morning and playing poker in the afternoon, I was counted as a "no show" to a meeting while attending another. I don't even know why I'm mentioning it except that it pissed me off to be doing what I should be and having my "boss" think I'm blowing off work. Vel anyvay...

So the new kitchen... here's before sort of. Unfortunately, I forgot to take pictures before the demo started- but you'll get the idea.

Okay, so let's just add a little...

Bam!

Bam!

Bam!

Bam!Bam!

New quartz countertop, swanstone sink, faucet, under cabinet lighting, "over the sink" light, and a Colorado slate backsplash. Lots of work, work, work- but it was worth it. Leslie designed the backsplash layout and it is very cool with pewter accents. I ran the tile saw, Leslie's mom and step-dad helped out in a huge way doing a little bit of everything.

Like the title said, I made some new friends lately too:

I met this "guy" in my backyard. His name is Butthead. He's about four feet long and hard on mice and small rabbits.

Finally, I met these guys at Leslie's graduation party. Their names are Dino and Swen and they are members of a Swedish rock group called Onyourputer. Very friendly and obviously "artistic". They told me the names of some of their songs and their latest release includes the singles, "Dude", "Play my glockenspheil", "Oh no, it's baby poop", "Can I fix your sink?", "Seven bikes and nowhere to ride" and my favorite "Quit touching me there!"

Another One Bites the Dust

See ya! Jerk!

Intentions

Can we say "single digit days?" Oh yes- nine- count 'em. My plan for my first Monday off from school is simple: I will sit in my driveway, in a comfortable chair, drinking coffee and waving to people driving to work. I suppose I will wave to my wife as well since she will still be working at that point. I'll get her to take a picture before she leaves and post it the same morning. I may as well- it's not like I'll have to go to work.

16.5

After today, which will be over in about 3.25 hours, I will have 16.5 days of school left before I get about three months off. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! At a point, time is worth much more than money.

Things have been really busy. I've been doing lots of yard work and it's paying off. My back yard is starting to look like a golf course. This time last year it kind of looked like a construction site. I'm most proud of my front yard where we have a really nice perenial flower bed that I've been working on since last year when it was pretty much a giant wad of lariope grass. I really need to post some before and after pics of that.

I've been turkey huntingand mushroom hunting.

Zero luck on either, but it's good to get outside in the woods in spring. There's a lot going on out there and it's a shame if you don't take a morning to check it out. I missed out on seeing any of that stuff for all the years I raced bikes. That was fun, but it's a nice change to get up, head out to the woods and watch everything going crazy coming to life. One interesting thing that I found last weekend when I was hunting was the fact that turtles can apparently see pretty well. I was walking kind of underneath this ledge of rock and moss. I got about 10 feet away from it and I could hear something making it's way through the undergrowth. I stopped and waited to see what it would be. Here comes this turtle doing his thing.

He stops and just stands there looking right at me. I wasn't even moving. Then he turned about and started heading away. He stops again and basically looks over his shoulder at me. He kept taking a few steps and looking back. It was weird.

I also thought of Butthead this weekend. I was looking for mushrooms in the woods and a 4.5 foot black snake kind of popped out and surprised me.

I taunted him with a stick for a minute until he looked fully pissed and started rearing up. Speaking of Butthead, I think I saw a photo of him at a race recently. Must be off the diet.

Mid-west culture on the skids

Don't 'cha wish your grandma was hot like me? Don't 'cha wish your grandma could drink the malt liquor like me? Don't 'cha? Don't 'cha? Sorry Jason, I couldn't help it.

Uh... I don't even know. I think we have a "Pat" in Columbia.

One for the good guys AKA: Ah Hell Yeah! Kevin gets his bike back.

So about an hour ago I was driving down a street here in C-town that I had never driven down before. I even mentioned it to Leslie as we drove down the dark street in the rain. Suddenly, I noticed a bike laying in the yard in front of a dumpy duplex on my right. I slowed down and Leslie says, "What are you doing?" "Hold on," I say, "I need to go back and check out that bike." I turn the car around, and I can tell the bike is nice and shouldn't be laying out in the rain. I look closely and I can tell it's a Cannondale. Here's what's weird. Just yesterday I was talking to this guy, Kevin, whose bike had been stolen a few weeks ago. He was telling me the story of how it happened when he had his back turned for just a moment before heading out on a ride. I told him I'd keep an eye out and maybe it would still turn up even though it had been weeks and usually those bikes get sold off pretty quickly after being stolen. But you never know... So I know this is the bike. I call Kevin up at his work, Klunk Bike Shop. He's there and I talk to his boss Karl, who says they'll be right over to meet me. (I was parked up the street like a sting getting ready to go down) After waiting a few minutes and getting really psyched, Kevin shows up. We pull down the street to the place where the bike is. Kevin gets out, looks at the bike, nods that it's his, walks up in the yard and grabs the bike and throws it in the back of his truck. We drive off. That's some sweet action.
It was just crazy. I had never been on that street before, and I had just talked to Kevin the day before about the situation. It was just meant to be. I wish I had had a camera with me.
I can tell you what the kid will say when he comes out and sees his stolen bike gone. "Oh hell no! Well ain't that about a bitch? Someone stole my stolen bike. god damn!"

Strange Days

I'm a firm believer that good blogs have lots of pictures. Lately, I haven't had any good pictures and I think about that every time I have an entry. So here's a random:

This is Ziggy when he was just few weeks old. Here he is now:

He's a sweet boy and a pain in the ass! He's about seven months old (teenager). Yeah, he acts like one too. But things have been better since we got Olivia:

She's a miniature Schnauzer. Lot's of attitude but very sweet. She's about half Ziggy's size, but she handles him just fine. You know, not the dog in the fight, but the fight in the dog.

In other news, Folgers Coffee finally came out with something decent- Gourmet Supreme. It's actually good for cheap coffee. I'm a coffee snob and I wouldn't drink it if it was crap. Try it out.

In music news: check out Lotus if you haven't already. I downloaded "Germination" from Itunes and it's good stuff if you're into instrumental.

Drink Pyramid Thunderbolt IPA if you like hops- lots of hops. It has to be the hoppiest beer ever. 6.7%.

I think my next blog needs to just be about beer. I love beer. Only good beer though.

At the holidays, I find myself drinking beer and eating cookies. That's a personal choice.

Uh... This is from last Labor Day weekend. My first movie premier with none other than the fat man of cycling. Mr. Tim. Who's your daddy?

Just a couple more months and I'll be seeing this down in Mexico. Lesie is just about finished with her Masters in Counseling. She just got her Praxis test results back and she scored REALLY high. About 200 points above what she needed to. Very proud and happy for her. Your kid should be so lucky to have her for their counselor.

Until the time I am in Mexico, not much to do but wait for it to get warm again.

Did I mention it was 18 degrees last night? UG! This too will pass. Happy Easter! Whatever that means to you. To me it means I don't go back to work until Tuesday.

Ring the Alarm

Ooohhhhhhhh...Three hours and 10 minutes until Easter break and a four day weekend that should have been five if it had not been for Old Man Winter rapping on my head with a hickory stick. He's a bastard and he's trying to get back in the door at the moment with a big 'ole snap of cold again. Luckily, he'll be kicked to the curb by Monday and we'll be back to some reasonable temps.
Not that it's related to winter or spring or any other season, but I got an Ipod for Christmas. It sat for a long time and Leslie was beginning to wonder if I was going to use it. I finally started dumping CDs on it and last night I used my Itunes gift card that I also got for a gift(thanks Arnolds). It was actually really cool how obscure of songs you can find on Itunes. I'm pretty pleased with how fast the songs download too. The only thing I don't like about Ipods is all the extras you need to buy: The case, the cords, the headphones for those of us who don't have mammoth ear canals, the armband for the gym. So far I have bought one thing and it's a good one. You know how you can buy a dock for your Ipod that has speakers? If you buy the actual Ipod one, it's about $300.00. I just bought a cord that connects your Ipod to your home tuner/amp. It was only $30.00 and I'm sure I could have found one for even less, but I bought the Monster brand and it does have pretty heavy guage cable- so it's a good deal. My Element also has a port for plugging in Ipods and that been pretty useful lately. So now I can listen to the radio, CDs, XM radio, or the Ipod on my way to and from work. It's a pretty nice drive this time of year less the past couple of days of cold. Overall, it's been a nice spring. It was 80 on Monday. Today it's about 40. Someonesgottodoit

33

Days before summer break begins. Then I'll have about three months to do whatever comes to mind. Like using this:

The one I have looks a little different with the logos. Now we have two black SUVs and a black lawnmower. This is the lawnmower I talked about getting earlier. I don't know why I'm into lawn stuff but my lawn and yard has come a long way since the bought our house about 16 months ago. I should have taken more before and after pictures. I guess I'm into lawnmowers since I spent a lot of summers on the end of one. I used to push mow my parent's acre lawn. That was about three hours of calculating how many more passes it would take to finish the different sides. And of course there's the saga of the Lawn Cheif. That was about four years of do it yourself repairs and rigging. Wheels falling off, deck cracking, tinkering with the fuel/air mix. I was always kind of afraid that the blade was going to fly off and chop me right at the ankles. He's gone now and has either become parts or been reinvented to cut again. He disappeared on trash day before the trash got picked up. I thought I saw him the other day, but it couldn't have been. Now I have the Yard Man. The motto is: "Makes tall grass short" Great. That's pretty much what I was looking for.

Prankster

I recently saw a news report on our local news about a certain local news woman who is known at one of our local stations for pulling lots of pranks. She passed on some extremely valuable information I put to use the very next day. I can't tell you all I learned because you might use it on me, but I can and will tell you that putting scotch tape over the receiver button on a co-workers phone and then going to the other room and calling them is well worth the effort. You call them, they pick up the phone and say, "hello?" and the phone contiunes to ring. In my perticular situation this is even better because we have a brand new phone system and it makes the called person feel like they're doing something wrong. So they start pushing all kinds of buttons on the phone and generally getting really frustrated. The only drawback in my situation is that each phone has caller ID, so once they see the tape on the phone- I'm had.
The next prank I intend to use involves donuts and a certain pickling chemical that resembles powdered sugar. I'll let you know...

One thing leads to another

First I buy some running shoes- start running. Next thing I know- I'm the new head coach for cross-country at the high school. Actually, there's a lot more to it than that, but it did happen pretty fast once it got rolling. I can't remember if it was my first year here or my second, but another teacher and I were talking about the possibility of cross-country racing coming to the district. It was just kind of talk- no planning or asking. I always thought it would be cool to coach cross-country and more interesting to me than football had been. But I was a football coach and we didn't have cross-country. Then there was a track coach clinic in the winter and the possibility of bringing cross-country to our district came up. My name got dropped for the coaching position. More time passes and the position becomes a reality. I apply. I interview with others. I become the coach. I make the paper. I'm famous in a small town. Yeah! Now it's my job to grow the sport locally and start a tradition. Apparently we had cross-country here about 15 or 20 years ago and it just kind of died out. It's kind of exciting to be the guy in charge of trying to bring it back.

The rainbow returns- and I thought nothing was going on.

Last year sometime I posted about how diverse Columbia is as a town. On the day that prompted my post I was almost run over by a couple of redneck dicks in a monster truck. Later that day I got a flat tire on my ride and was offered help by none other than the mayor of our city. Columbia is a university city and that brings a lot of diversity. I'm glad to say it's a pretty progressive place to live.
Unfortunately, we have some not-so-progressive thinkers coming out to parade this weekend. The National Socialist Movement will be putting on a parade downtown this Saturday. The NSM is the largest neo-Nazi movement in the US today. I don't know how they came up with their name, but I've elected to give them the nickname, "butthole". I mean think about it, why go to the trouble of saying, "Hey dude, I'm in the National Socialist Party." Or you might confuse someone by saying, "I'm in the NSM." No, no, no. Just use the k.i.s.s. (keep it simple stupid) method and say, "I'm a butthole." Everyone will know what you mean. Nonetheless, here they come on Saturday. Not much to be done about it but ignore them I guess. Apparently a couple of years ago they were having a parade or rally in Toledo, OH and it started a four hour riot. I can only hope it doesn't come to that.
Well, whatever happens maybe it'd be swallowed a little easier with this .

Lawn Man to take over for Lawn Chief

There's really no point to this post. I just like getting on other blogs and seeing new stuff so I'll try to do the same. It's the last day of February- thank God, because that means spring is coming and winter is leaving. I question why I live in this state every winter- I hate it- and this was actually a pretty bad winter for around here. Soon though, things will green up and I'll have to buy a new lawn mower because the Lawn Chief finally kicked the bucket last fall. You might remember the Chief from earlier posts where I had repaired him at least half a dozen times. Finally, last fall, his pull-rope broke and I didn't have all the tools I needed to take him apart, put in the new rope, and then put him back together. I tired but he resisted so I kicked him to the curb on a chilly Sunday night. Monday is trash day and in the early morning light I could see that someone had taken pity on the cheif and taken him home before he became a citizen of the local land fill. It'd be funny to see him chopping down a yard out about town some day on one of my runs that I'm looking forward to when it gets warm enough to get a sunburn. But that's all fantasy and the reality is that right now I'm in ISS with four of my past students. A fight and two brothers who thought they could both skip school without anyone putting the coincidence together. It's grey out, chilly, and windy. Guess I'll just sit back and wait for spring and the thought of being here in June, after Leslie graduates with her Masters in Counseling.
P.S. Consumer Reports lists the "Lawn Man" as the best buy all around push mower. Gotta get mine yo.

The new game- running

Yesterday I went to the Starting Block. They are a running, triathlon outfitter next to the gym I go to. They put me on a treadmill and filmed me walking and running. Then they sold me these.

Notice the MU colors. I had become really frustrated the day before shopping at the mall for running shoes. First of all you can pretty much trust that the guy working at FootLocker doesn't know much about what you need. You know, "Try these on. Walk to the door and come back. "How do they feel?" "Uh, pretty good." "Good, meet me at the register." Well, enough of that. I actually got "fitted" for these shoes. Turns out there's a lot more to the different types of shoes than the colors and styling. I actually saved about $30.00 by getting the fitting done. If you are in the market for running shoes, you should find a place that does the fitting. It was free where I went.

Cute and Cuddley vs. Gross

Below are two pictures: One very nice, the other not. Can you tell which is which?

Ice fishing has been good.

More Dreams- More death and destruction

What the hell? Two nights ago I dreamed of a man being killed on power lines. Last night there was more death. I was walking down the street in a town I didn't recognize. It was warm and humid- perhaps New Orleans. I was with some guy and I'm not sure who he was, but I think it may have been Randy Jackson from American Idol. We were walking and talking. All of a sudden a man comes out of the dark, draws a large gun from his jacket, and starts shooting. Randy takes one in the gut and falls. I say I'll go get help and take off. The guy with the gun is after me, but luckily I can run fast in this dream. I somehow arrive at an apartment complex and turn to find him close behind me. I head upstairs and he starts shooting. He misses and I jump down to his floor and attack him. I put my thumbs in his eyes and poke out his eyes. I wake up... Not cool.

Winter Entertainment

When it's truly cold out to the point you really can have skin exposed, you need to find unusual things to do. Around here, ice fishing is not a popular sport. But it's truly cold out and the lake that the Conservation Dept. stocks with trout is frozen over with 6+ inches of ice. So ice fishing is popular right now. The last time I went ice fishing was about three winters ago. It's a blast and a good lesson in survival.
I went out this past Saturday and was on the ice before 7:00am. Only part of my face was exposed, so I was in good shape. The problem is you can't do much in the way of fine motor work with big gloves on- so you take them off to get the hook from the fish or bait the hook. There's a formula for how much time you can have skin exposed at different temps. before it starts to freeze. I passed that limit. It's not so much the cold and numb feeling that's a problem- it's the warming back up part that smarts. I honestly don't think I've ever been in so much pain with no way to stop it. You just have to wait. It's three days later now and my fingertips are still just a little sore. I did fill my limit of four trout though with one really nice fish. Pictures to follow.
I guess I need entertainment when I sleep too. Maybe that's why I had a dream last night that I saw a guy get electricuted on powerlines... His face melted off. That one woke me up.

A ghost is born.

Sometimes you can't get mad at kids for the weird things they do in class. When I looked up from my computer I saw a student holding up this little sign like he was advertising a new show coming to Broadway. "Bring that here!" He sat down and tore it in half and wadded it up. "No, no, no. Bring it here." He reluctantly brought it to me and waited as I ironed it out and pieced it back together. As I started laughing all I could say was, "Go sit down."